Are You Serious?
I see and hear many things that I have difficulty believing.
Sometimes a friend or colleague bungles badly. Or the television shows a public figure saying something that numbs the mind. And I’m often tempted, during such times, to just look at the offending party and ask, clearly and loudly, “Really?”
Well, a bank teller in New York beat me to it. According to this story from the Boston Herald online, a female would-be robber threaten to fire her gun unless the teller handed her cash—but she fled as soon as the teller asked if she was serious.
If a quick “Are you serious?” is all it takes to knock sense into people—be they in sports, news sources, entertainment, or politics—I’m ready to go:
Hey Terrell Owens:
During your Cowboys’ hard-fought loss to the Redskins on Sunday, about one-third of the team’s offensive plays went through you, while star running back Marion Barber only carried the ball eight times. Yet afterward, you complained that the game’s result would have been different if you’d had the ball MORE.
Are you serious?!?
Hey mainstream media:
You’ve given less attention to Paul Newman’s death last week than Bernie Mac’s death earlier this year.
Are you serious?!?
Hey Clay Aiken:
You expect us to care that you’re coming out of the transparent closet. Do you really think anyone other than the most pathetic, reality show-watching couch potatoes gives a crap about your sexuality?
Are you serious?!?
Hey politicians:
You want to give hundreds of billions of dollars to people who were too stupid to avoid mortgages they couldn’t afford. You want folks like me—who bought within our budgets—to make their payments for them?
Are you serious?!?
posted by David Amulet @ 5:01 PM
15 wisecracks
15 Comments:
I love it, great line!
As for Clay Aikens, my first response was "Duh." ;-)
It looked as if the Cowboys' offensive coordinator was trying to appease T.O. at the expense of some of their other offensive weapons. T.O. needs to quit beefing and play ball.
I think timing has a lot to do with the media's coverage of Paul Newman's death thus far. He died the same day as the Presidential debate. Also, the $700 billion financial bailout story is on the minds of many. I say thus far because I believe the print media will pay ample tribute to Paul Newman in the coming weeks.
When Clay revealed that he was gay, my first response was the same as LisaBindacity. My second response was, "He must have a new project coming out". No pun intended on those last two words.
Clay Aiken is gay??
Are you serious?!?
Get outta town!
I see and hear things all the time that baffle my mind. Thanks for writing a succinct post that really touches upon the heart of what irks me. Acknowledging it is the first step, i think anyway. :)
I'd like to hear your thoughts on why Bernie Mac seemed to get more notice than Paul Newman. PAUL NEWMAN!
That is a good line "Are you serious". Should be used more often.
Lisa, Jenn: I know, I know, it's a shock ... that we care.
Malclom: Good observations all around.
Janet: My mind is easily baffled. But sometimes, just sometimes, it's due to others' idiocy.
Barbara: I think Malcolm nailed it--it's the timing. So many other big stories at the same time. Either that, or mainstream media thinks Bernie was a more important pop culture influence than Paul, which would be like saying the Monkees were a bigger pop culture influence than the Beatles.
Angel: Are you serious?
Just when you thought T.O. was maturing...
I heard this story too and just laughed, too funny.
Good post for sure!
TO is a jackass
Jeff: Maturity is funny thing. You can regress all too easily.
Phats: It's best to laugh at the madness. Just not too much, or people with think you're mad.
Hey David!
I am with you on those "are you serious?" questions!
I blasted two letters to my Congressman last week urging him to vote no. I should have just sent him the question "Are you serious?"
Have a great weekend!
~xo
Lee Ann
Instead of saying, "Are you serious?" I used to say, "Are you cereal?"
It didn't have quite the same effect.
The real "are you serious?" moment for me on the bailout bill was the earmarks--
* Tax breaks for manufacturers of safe wooden arrows for kids.
* Tax breaks for NASCAR track developers.
* Allowing fishermen injured from the Exxon Valdez twenty years ago to amortize their ridiculous tort amount over twenty years instead of declaring it in one year like the rest of us would have to.
* Tax breaks for Samoan sweat shops.
* Tax breaks for Puerto Rican rum manufacturers.
* Tax breaks for Hollywood film producers.
etc., equaling approx. $150-billion cost to the taxpayers.
Man, that just may be the best weapon ever. Imagine the training I'd have had if I went to combat knowing I had that ace up my sleeve...
To the entire media, both sides and international: Are you serious? Look at what you force down our throats and the important stuff gets washed away.
Lee Ann: Good for you for writing to your Congressman. Too many people complain about things without realizing that we do have representatives who, if they want to get re-elected, listen to constituents' opinions.
Phoenix: It's great to see you back. I'll swing by your site to see if you're blogging again.
ZW: The details of this bill make me ill. Hey, that rhymes!
Mike: Maybe not such a good tool in combat.
Post a Comment
<< Home